
How to Make Long-Distance Relationships Work
This post talks about a few easy measures that all of us can take right away to make our long-distance relationships work. These simple yet highly effective tips will drastically change the tone of your relationship, and will allow you to strengthen the bond between you and your better-half like never before.
Long-distance relationships can get exceedingly difficult to handle. After all, we’re social animals who crave physical touch from those we love and hold dear. When we are deprived of this basic human necessity, we tend to feel depressed and lonely, as though we’re missing something extremely crucial in our lives. This is followed by an increase in the frequency and intensity of arguments with our spouses, which only adds to our misery. We wish to feel happy and loved, but the distance makes it almost impossible to look past our inability to be with the person we value most.
However, it makes no sense to let go of someone you care about so deeply only because you don’t share the same roof. Not everyone gets to enjoy a beautiful relationship filled with joy and affection. If you happen to be one of the few lucky ones, make sure you leave no stone unturned in your quest to keep your soulmate by your side.
Thankfully, with the rapid advancement in technology, many new doors have been opened in this regard. Internet has become cheaper, quality of both voice and video calls has become better, and overall the world has been transitioning into the digital space so much so that virtual connections have become a way of life. And to top it all, we no longer have to wait for weeks and months to receive that letter stating how much our family misses us everyday.
Learning to use technology to make ourselves feel closer to our loved ones can prove to be remarkably useful. There are countless creative ways that we can use the latter to make long-distance relationships work like a charm. And we are here to make you aware of just that. Without further ado, let’s begin!
The Morning & Evening Routine

This is the first measure to make long-distance relationships work. Most of us are busy with work during the day, and it becomes somewhat difficult to find the time to connect with our partners thanks to the ever-increasing expectations and ever-decreasing deadlines. However, as an alternative, we can very well make it a point to call or text our partners before and after work-hours as a daily ritual. And we should get into the habit of doing this no matter what.
This will let the other person know that you think of them first thing in the morning and how much you miss them when you reach home after a long and tiring day. We know it sounds trivial and a little cliched even. But the results you’ll achieve with this simple gesture will be truly remarkable. The important thing to remember is that under no circumstance should you break this routine. On days you find yourself to be occupied before or after work, send your partner a simple text telling them so.
Good communication forms the foundation of a deep and meaningful relationship. So it’s imperative that you never leave your partner hanging, waiting for you to call or text them, because then it makes them feel like they are being taken for granted. Irrespective of how busy you are, you can always find a bare minimum of 2 minutes to let your partner know about your unavailability.
In addition to this, you ought to put in conscious effort to take genuine interest in the daily events of their lives. For ex. You could ask them about their day, or if they ate properly, or if everything went smoothly at home and work. You could share your own day-to-day experiences with them intently. You could even ask them about the well being of their family. Or how you would love to share a cup of tea with them in the evening. You get the idea, right? Great! Let us now move on to our next point.
Get involved in each other’s lives

This is the second measure to make long-distance relationships work, and is an extension of the ‘Morning & Evening Routine’. It consists of several aspects, and we shall discuss each one of them in good detail. If you’ve just started with your relationship, then you’re probably still at the “getting to know each other” phase. This is the best time to build good rapport and develop trust and goodwill in your relationship. This can be easily achieved by playing the role of an active listener and staying true to yourself. How you handle the information being provided to you is extremely critical since nothing breaks trust more than using something your partner told you in confidence against them.
This is an interesting phase because both of you will be keen on learning what the other person has to share. So essentially, getting involved in each other’s lives will come naturally to you at this stage. After all, there’s good reason as to why it’s called the “honeymoon period”. However, as time shall progress, this initial spark will begin to fade a little, and this is where the need to purposefully get involved in the other person’s life will come in.
Assuming that you’ve reached or are about to reach that phase in your relationship, let us enlist a few small gestures that you can make to rekindle that lost spark and get more involved in each other’s lives. For ex. If you’re going out for shopping or exploring options to purchase something online, ask your partner for suggestions when narrowing down your favorites. Not just shopping, you can actually ask for each other’s advice on several matters, such as what should you wear on an upcoming special occasion, or what should you do when you’re stuck in a difficult situation with someone at work. The idea is to create a reliable, friendly ecosystem and a safe space for each other, so much so that both of you look forward to sharing all kinds of experiences, even from a distance.
When you’re out with your friends, call or text your partner to let them know what you’re up to. This is not to keep them updated but to let them in on the experience as if they were actually there with you. Similarly, when you’re working late, and end up being stressed or fatigued, convey your feelings to your partner. Or if you have a big presentation coming up, and you’re getting anxious and distressed, call your partner and pour your heart out as to how you feel. This will send a message to your subconscious mind that you’re not alone in your battles, and at the same time, give your soulmate the chance to act as your support system – something they’ve always wanted to become.
Another way to get involved as a couple is to plan out things to do together. You could plan on watching a movie, or playing online games, or reading a book, so on and so forth. You could plan virtual dates wherein you both go out to eat in your own locations while simultaneously connecting over a video call. You could even book your weekends to carry out meaningful activities like meditating, cooking, learning new skills by taking a course together, etc.
By now you must have realised that the possibilities at your disposal are virtually limitless. All you need is a little creativity and an open line of communication, and voila – you will have brought about a massive positive shift in the state of your long-distance relationship. Always remember, if you’re serious about spending your entire life with someone, you’re going to have to put in the required effort to make it last. If you aren’t ready to do that and still hope to find a keeper, you’re only fooling yourself and no-one else.
Let go of your insecurities

This is the third measure to make long-distance relationships work. Trust plays a major role in any relationship and it becomes almost impossible to re-establish it once broken. When someone we hold dear breaks our trust, it can lead to the development of permanent insecurities, and can even push some of us to the brink of paranoia. This in turn can have a devastating effect on all our future relationships. Insecurities can develop from personal experiences as well as from learning about those of others. This, combined with the fact that for some odd reason we are magnetically drawn towards negative emotions over positive ones, gives us some major trust issues.
On top of it all, being in a long-distance relationship only adds to the problem (for obvious reasons), however, it’s important to understand that we shouldn’t let our past define our future. Letting go of self-defeating insecurities is a must to make long-distance relationships work. It may take a while to get rid of them completely, but making small consistent efforts can produce remarkable results in the longer run.
Social media has proven to be an enabler of infidelity in modern relationships, more so in long-distance ones. With the introduction of applications like Facebook, Instagram, Tinder, etc., it has become outrageously convenient to connect with new people without having to put in any physical effort. Consequently, this has led to increased trust issues and insecurities amongst couples at large. However, the way most people react to this possibility can be self-destructive and can ruin even the most truthful of relationships.
Here’s what you need to know if you do not wish to destroy what you have with the person you love most. First thing’s first, in the context of long-distance relationships, you will be at a great disadvantage when it comes to catching your partner in the act. A cheat will find a way to cheat and there isn’t much that you’ll be able to do about it. The only thing you can do is to make peace with this fact. Do not get into the habit of logging into your partner’s social media accounts to check his conversations with others. If they wish to be unfaithful, they can very well create a secondary account that you would have no knowledge about.
It will be senseless to spy on your partner without probable cause because it is highly likely that your better-half has completely devoted his life to you, and all you’ll be doing is disrespecting his love for you. This is not to say that you do not need to stay vigilant. But unnecessary confrontations and frequent display of over-possessive and insecure behavior can become toxic and suffocating for the both of you.
Of course, if you do feel the urge to ask questions, you can always do that, but in a calm and gentle manner. Getting angry without a valid reason will never yield the results you desire and will only put you in a bad light. Instead, consider acting peacefully and observe the reaction you receive in return. The way your partner responds to your enquiry will indicate a great deal if there’s something to be worried about after all. But if you choose to be aggressive and overbearing right from the start, it will force your partner to lie about the most trivial of events just to avoid bad blood. This is the last thing you would want in your relationship.
All relationships are built on mutual trust and respect. If you violate either of them, you will end up in a negative place sooner or later. Your partner should be able to speak their mind with you, and whether or not this happens will actively depend on your own actions and behavior. Letting go of your insecurities in no way implies that you turn a blind eye towards everything your partner does. Truth be told, it is less about how you feel and more about how to handle and express the same.
Respect your partner’s feelings

This is the fourth measure to make long-distance relationships work. Respecting each other’s feelings and emotions is indispensable in any relationship. And one of the easiest ways to be able to do that is to focus on developing empathy as a virtue. Cultivating empathy will enable you to better understand what your partner is going through, and consequently, you’ll be able to respond in a helpful and constructive manner.
Many a time, it so happens that we get consumed by our own emotions so much so that we fail to realise how our behavior ends up hurting those we hold dear. And since we interact most about what we go through with our soulmates, we often tend to lash out on them even when it’s not their fault. When such events occur frequently, it can create an unseen distance between the couple.
You see, when it comes to long-distance relationships, we only have the emotional and mental aspects to rely upon for letting our loved ones know how much they mean to us. When we act aggressively with them, that too for no fault of their own, we relinquish this one way of making our partner feel loved, supported, and understood. After all, we have no right to use them as our emotional punching bag, right?
The next virtue that you can develop in order to respect your partner’s feelings much more effectively is patience. It is wise to not react when filled with rage and anger. If, for some unavoidable reason, you feel a sudden surge of aggression building up inside of you, never ever choose to react right away. Instead, take some time off and remove yourself from the situation if need be. Let your anger pass, and allow yourself to think clearly again. Negative emotions have a tendency to cloud our sense of judgement, and anger is most definitely the worst of them all.
When your partner expresses displeasure over your actions, do not take it to be a complain or criticism of sorts. Instead, dive deeper by trying to look past their words and focus on the emotion. Try to ascertain what exactly made them feel that way. And more importantly, never ever dismiss their feedback as unnecessary drama. Validate their feelings even when you think they are overreacting, and let them know that with you they can express their thoughts freely and comfortably. You can very well tell your side of the story once the dust settles. Remember, if your partner feels understood, there is no force in this Universe which can drive you two apart.
Respecting your partner’s feelings is not just about damage control. It also involves making an effort to do the things that make your better-half feel happy and loved. And it is the little things that matter the most. When trying to make long-distance relationships work, you need to concentrate more on prevention instead of relying solely on the cure. You need to make proactive gestures to let your partner know that their thoughts, feelings and emotions are unconditionally respected and greatly valued.
Physical touch is important too!

This is the fifth measure to make long-distance relationships work. While emotional and mental support plays a vital role in keeping long-distance relationships strong and healthy, the physical aspect of our interactions as a couple can never be truly replaced by any intangible substitute. As human beings, getting physically intimate with our partners is just as crucial as having deep meaningful conversations with them.
And this isn’t limited to just sex. A long warm hug and a short peck on the lips before going to bed can instill a sense of comfort and security that no amount of sincere dialogue can. Therefore, make time to see your partner at regular intervals, no matter the circumstance. Make plans to see each other on festive occasions, or perhaps go for a trip to a mutually decided destination. Create a bucket list to fulfil during each visit. This is especially important to keep the spark in your relationship alive.
Conclusion
Long-distance relationships require special care and attention from our end in order to make them work, and the lack of physical interaction only makes it worse. It then becomes exceedingly critical to make the most of what you can do to make your partner feel loved and cared for even though you’re hundreds of miles away. Focusing on multiple little details through out the day matters much more than making a one-time grand effort. Share this article if you think there’s someone in your circle of impact who can benefit from reading this.
Resources
We have added links for purchasing books that we believe you may find useful while applying the above mentioned strategies for making long-distance relationships work. If you’ll use the provided links for your purchases, we’ll receive a small commission which will help us to continue publishing free quality content for you.
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The 8 Essential Traits of Couples Who Thrive

The Long-Distance Relationship Survival Guide

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